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First, of all because it’s hot, so hot. Secondly, I was spending so much time on my long beautiful hair and not going anywhere ! We all deserve more time and less hair to style . Finally, quarantine . Am I right? We could all use a dose of change . I had all of these reasons to chop it off , but arriving to the point where I grabbed some scissors and did it is actually more complicated .
I love my hair, that has been a long journey, but I eventually arrived . We all have a personal and sensitive relationship with our hair . I have grown to learn more about my own relationship and how big a part of my life it is.
When I was younger I was in a relationship with someone who told me I was never allowed to cut it . This ingrained in me the thought that men wouldn’t find me attractive without my long locks . I developed conflicting emotions towards my hair . Part of me wants to cut my hair as rebellion, I don’t care what others think and I want them to know it. Part of me wants to keep it long because that’s when I think I am pretty.
In my decision to cut my hair , I have to see these feelings . I have to feel them. So that I can release them and not make decisions based on them. Observe yourself before you decide to make a major change . Take a moment. What are your experiences and emotions telling you? Are those worthy?
I’m not there yet on releasing them. I am embarrassed to admit how many times I asked my husband if I could cut all my hair off. That’s nothing I need to ask a man. I will say all it did was assure me in my marriage . My husband, will also point out I don’t need to ask and that I can do whatever I want , that I’m beautiful with my hair anyway. I did push it this time and ask what about if I just shave it off ? And he came through again with unlimited support. But obviously this instinct is showing a part of me still believes I won’t be attractive without my hair.
This is also a repetitive and toxic message that many women receive. When I do cut my hair off . When I took scissors to it the other night, you would think that I had quit my job and become a nomad . The world thinks it is wild. Not even an hour after I was outside and my neighbor asked if I cut my hair. Then says “Oh mental breakdown?”
First of all if any hardworking and powerful woman has a mental breakdown and the worse thing that happens is she cuts her hair !!! Well then I’m calling that a win. Next, why does a woman who wants short hair have to have lost her mind? Did Britney Spears ruin it for us all? This connotation of mental breakdown being associated with cutting your hair needs to be thrown in the trash . 2020 we are embracing the freedom to have short hair as a woman. There is something beautiful in cutting your hair. I worked for 3 years to grow it . Cutting it felt free and satisfying . Cutting your hair off isn’t crazy, it’s a beautiful moment . Allow it to be just that.
I’ll have long hair again in a couple years . It will feel heavy and exhausting . I’ll always be able to remember the moment I cut it all off. It’s not in the end about the moments that you didn’t have , it’s the moments you did . Now I have that moment .